Running

In the land of Meh

I think my period is on its way because I am feeling extremely meh. Meh meh MEH in the land of meh. Aside from meh, I'm also feeling irritable to the power of a million, and cranky like someone just woke me up from a good dream.

> : [

When I'm about to get my period, several things start happening:

1) I break out. I usually get a pimple somewhere and this time it's my forehead.

2) I become positively RAVENOUS. I want to eat everything in sight. Today, Elissa and I made a Safeway run to grab chips and spinach dip.

3) Many thanks to my hormones, I get really emotional and I start doing stupid things like.. oh, I don't know--texting ex-boyfriends.

4) I bloat like there's no tomorrow. *shakes fist*

In other news.. I had an exhausting weekend. Celebrated my girl Erin's birthday at Republic on Friday night. Two of my fav girlies got together and got ready like old times (I seriously love those 2). Got home at 5AM and got up two hours later to go to work. I went to work wearing the same makeup from the nightbefore. I even announced in the car ride back, "Fuck it. I'm not washing my face tonight." Carver says, "Ewww.. Are you at least going to brush your teeth?" I'm like, "Dude.. If I were to choose between the two, it'd be my face. If I'm not washing my face, no way am I brushing my teeth."

DON'T WORRY. I brushed my teeth when I got up. I went out on a limb for everyone in that restaurant to brush my teeth that morning..

Saturday night was just bad. I don't even want to recollect the details. It had to do with my friend, the birthday boy, puking in my girlfriend's car.. on her new beige leather seats. And he woke up the next morning asking what happened and laughing cause he didn't remember..

Anywho, I should sleep!! I'm falling back into the same bad habits as last semester. SMH... This is no good!!!!

a quickie

TBH: I never really understood what the F was going on in Le Petit Prince.. I read it when I was maybe 8 or 9 (more like had it read to me). It's on my list of must-reads before I die. I just remembered he was hella weird.. I mean, what if he's just another Christopher Boone?

This week has been slightly better than they usually come. Gorgeous weather, one of my fav's birthdays, seeing La Familia, no fights with my mom (it's been all love lately).. and then there's these gusts of people coming back into my life.

Like whaaaa--?

It's funny, because last week when Nicolle and I were talking on her patio, we stumbled upon the very subject of people trying to squeeze their way back into your life. It's because the night before, someone had asked me if we could have a "fresh start" and I straight up said, "I don't believe in fresh starts." Because I don't. A broken bone will never be as strong as it was before it was broken. There will always be ugly reminders and the awkward pause when you run over a touchy subject.

Anyways, I asked Nicolle if she believed in fresh starts and she said "Sometimes." She explained that it really depended on the person. If she loved the person, of course.. she'd want them back in her life too, despite some bad memories. On the contrary, if she was fed up with this person, she'd tell them to back the fuck up and don't get too close. Nobody wants to go through the same kind of hurt again.

And that's kinda how I'm feeling right now. I have on friend who I used love very much, and we got into a bad place where I just couldn't handle it. I'm a non-believer when it comes to being someone's best friend, and it's cutting it close for me when it comes to having several "best friends". Anyways, long story short, we had sooo many fights. So many rough patches. So many "let's make this work" and it just couldn't.

It seems as though now, we both realize, that the only thing we really needed was time. And time has really changed both of us. For the better though (Thank God). This is person is my "biased fresh start case". The next one is really irritating me.

I'm not sure if I'm more irritated with myself or with them. While it's comforting to have old friends back, it's also frustrating how you have filled their void and continued living your life, and then they just wanna waltz back in?

Like hell no. I got used to not having you around.

It's like going on menopause then having flow come to town. Like I thought you were GONE FOR GOOD and I WAS HAPPY TO SEE YOU GO, but now you're like "I will do anything to be your friend again." Um..

Who said I want anything to do with you?

It's called doing what's good for you, and even though you weren't so bad; I told myself that any person who walks out on their friend just because their girlfriend told them to, is a good boyfriend but no friend of mine. Close, but not quite.

I am GENERALLY a very forgiving person, and to be honest, I will probably forgive this douchebag in a few weeks.. but that doesn't mean things are going to be the same. I'm telling you now!!! *shakes fist* (Blogspot as my witness, and to whom it may concern.)

On a brighter note.. I'm in the midst of planning my 19th birthday and it's been breeze so far, thanks to my friends who have been ridiculously cooperative about it. My birthday falls smack in the middle of midterm season, not to mention my actual birthday is on a Tuesday; yet they've all promised they'd be there on my actual birthday and whatever other day I choose! They're either as amazing as I think they are or they're just a buncha party animals.. *shifty eyes*

I'm kidding.. I'm actually more touched than I should be about their cooperation and support. It's really annoying, but I can't help but say how much I love my group of friends. We've been friends since we were FIVE. They're legit my second family.. I wouldn't have it any other way then spending my time with them.

I'm off to bed, day 1 of my 3-midterms-in-a-row streak is about to begin ;) Wouldn't miss that for the world..

Even bad memories have a place in a good life.

Do you ever

Stop and sigh*,


and realize there's just so many beautiful things in this world?


I do.


it makes me want to live more,

and that i shall do.

(fall) must haves

1) jeffrey campbell litas... soo sexy and wearable at the same time. droooooooool.. hopefully ill be putting in an order tomorrow on karmaloop

2) wedges. i have 2 pairs that i loooove, i could wear wedges everyday. but i want ones that lace up slash wear on the regular. im diggin these ones by jeffrey campbell

3) nerdy glasses.. im feelin prada!

4) speedy 35 or 40 in the original lv monogram. i love classic-traditional anything and everything. the first thing im going to do once i get this bag though is SIT ON IT. i want that vintagey-used mushy feel. i was never a fan of the speedy because i found it looked too boxy, but with some manhandling im sure ill be able to love one

5) laughing cow.. for a good laugh everyday


6) marc by marc jacobs pavé star earrings--ive been on the search for these everywhere... unfortunately most places dont carry enough marc by marc jacobs accessories to have them :(

7) grandma sweaters because in vancouver, this is what i call sweater weather



8) rings. it doesnt necessarily have to be a cage ring since i highly doubt id wear it on a daily basis.. but the ones from bcbg are soo nice.. but they cost as much as each of the jeffrey campbell shoes i want..

this is just a small sample of what exists in my blackberry memopad, where i have a file entitled ULTIMATE SHOPPING LIST and everything that i see that i want, i stick it in there. this includes stuff like carmex to a metal waterbottle which i actually need (i bring a plastic bottle of water to school everyday, which seems like such a waste and horrible for the environment). i will most likely be adding to this list later in the season.. my birthday is coming up so *crosses fingers*!!! i cant decide whether i want the litas or the wedges more atm..

* please excuse my grammar thats more horrible than usual.. my mom somehow changed the keyboard on my laptop to canadian french so all my apostrophes come out looking like this: è and my question marks like this: É.